Two Sessions in Gobbledygook

The Two Sessions, the annual political meeting is on now in Beijing

China's big political event, 两会 or "the Two Sessions" annual meeting is on, and I can't keep track of all the new legislation that's coming down, but a relative told me on a recent trip to Guangzhou that online monitoring was so tight that the couldn't even use WeChat to communicate with their relatives to arrange when to meet up.

They had to resort to either calling their phone number, or SMS... Seems like an aim to inconvenience over a billion people for a few days...

But perhaps the biggest irony is a propaganda rap song about the Two Sessions released by Xinhua news agency. The song that runs 4:48 was composed by rapper Su Han who became famous from being on the reality show Sing! China.



His song, called "Two Sessions", is a total cringe fest because the lyrics are utterly grammatically incorrect and Su seems to have looked up a lot of words in the thesaurus and tried to use bigger words to sound more sophisticated. However it has the opposite effect in showing he does not know exactly what the word means.

For example one line says: "Eject all the rapaciousness like shaking of nephrolithiasis".

Rapper Su Han singing his heart out in unintelligible English

What?

The chorus is also mind-boggling: "We've got two sessions, we've got two sessions/ For the fragrance we're blessing, to the world we show our affection."

Yeah, OK...

Or how about: "See the Larch rolling miles upon miles/ when we meet satisfied Popeye".

What does Popeye have to do with China?

And the song keeps going for over four minutes without making any kind of sense.

Who put Su up to this? And what was his time line? Did they ask him to write it in a day?

Perhaps the most ironic thing is that the Chinese government is wary of hip hop, and while there is no full ban in place, since last year it has been considered not to be politically correct to be associated with that genre of music.

How does this hip hop song make China cool?

Why then, has the government released this atrocious song in the style of hip hop?

It probably thought co-opting hip hop it would make the authorities sound cool to the younger generation, but it's kind of like once your parents like what you like, you move onto something else...